Ten things I hate and love because it will make me feel better to put them down here.

Like the film which is great but I hate

1. Those dreadful cheery letters people send you to tell you how wonderful their lives are. Liars.

2. Evenings. After Eggheads there is this big scary nothingness which I fill with work, wine and food. For some reason summers are worse than dark nights.

3. Quiz shows where I can never answer anything. Television, sport, personalities, popular songs. With the exception of football ( I wrote a book about it ), tennis and snooker both of which I really like. One other exception I love Eggheads.

4. Television generally, all those dreadful food programmes, reality programmes, dancing, morning news, the people who go around escaping to the country thinking they can keep a couple of sheep in the garden!!  And can afford an Aga but don't know how to use one.

5.  The country anyway, cyclists, tractors, caravans and weekend drivers. I love to go to Weardale but I couldn't bear not to live in the town.

6. People who use fuck instead of breathing or as an adjective.

7. People who think northern accents mean people are stupid or below them.

8. Sweets in general. Cakes, biscuits and cheese flavoured crisps.

9. Religion. It denigrates women.

10. People who tell those with depression to pull themselves together.



I love

1.The Champagne Bar and red wine and white wine.

2. Good homemade food, in particular soup, bread and Indian meals. This varies depending on how I feel.

3. My caravan, which of course is in the country, see number 5 on hating the country.

4. My lovely little town house which has original fireplaces and stained glass windows and is ten minutes walk from my beloved cathedral See 9 above, I love psalms, choirs singing, the dean who seems such a lovely bloke. I also love St Cuth's which is near and where I go to classical concerts, St Oswald's because it's so beautiful and I go to university orchestral concerts there and oh, yes thousands of other churches and graveyards and so on.For history and music.  And I love to write about religion because it's so complex and offers all manner of opportunities to slag off vicars. In the book which comes out in the summer the vicar is killed. Sorry but I really enjoyed this.

5. The herbs in my garden and all the other lovely things which Howard sorts out for me. I grow  basil on the window ledge and in the garden bay leaves, lemon balm, rosemary thyme, curly parsley. I adore lavender .

6. My friends of course. Whatever would I do without them. I can't name them, it wouldn't be polite.

7. Music, opera, ballet, anything by Chopin and the rest of the gang.

8. Anthony Trollope and everything he ever wrote.  Books, books, books. Fiction and non. Anything. I once read a book on sewage systems of Northumberland. Fascinating.

9. Audio books on Amazon which save my nights from despair.

10. Ceylon tea, Assam Tea, Darjeeling tea, Earl Grey tea.

Most of all of course I love my wonderful daughter and my writing in that order which of should go first and goes last and first and every other  number.

I feel a lot better now. Eggheads is on any second so I must go.